RBST: Help Group
by ProdigiousGirl
Summary: Robert and various characters from different shows have story telling problems. Dr. P'g does her best to help them change their ways. Beyblade, Digimon, Shaman King, Cyborg 009, Simpsons, Fairly Odd Parents, SpongeBob, Duel Masters


And you thought Robert had really bad story telling skills

PROLOGUE: Ok, here we join Robert (from Beyblade)in his RBST group. RBST stands for "Really Bad Story Telling". However, Robert is not alone. It seems as though many of our least favourite characters-minus some-have really bad story telling skills. Robert is joined in his session today with other characters such as: Cosmo (Fairly Odd Parents), Cody (Digimon), Joe (Digimon), Ryo (Shaman King),Ren (Shaman King), 007 (Cyborg 009) Mimi (Duel Masters), Ralph Wiggim (The Simpsons), and Patrick (SpongeBob Squarepants). Today, with Dr. P.G (P'g), the group will discuss family history.

* * *

The session begins... 

Dr. P'g: Ok everyone, today we're talking about family history. It's important you know about your family history and can tell the story with great detail, while keeping it short.

Robert: you uncouth woman, that's simple!

Dr. P'g: Then why don't you start us off, Robert.

Robert: Certainly. My family history starts in 560 B.C.

Dr. P'g: --;; (to self) oh boy…we're going to be here all day.

Robert: It started on a simple Wednesday-though it wasn't known as Wednesday back then…

((3 hours later))

Robert: So on grapefruit day (Authors note: the French calendar consisted of days named after fruit after the French Revolution in the 1700's), my great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great…

Dr. P'g: Robert, when I say family history, and short story…I mean brief detail. You said your family started in 560 A.D, correct?

Robert: B.C.

Dr. P'g: right, my bad. B.C. Why don't you say, that "my family, the Jurgen's…"

Robert: What? You're not part of the Jurgen's! Don't lie you uncouth simpleton!

Dr. P'g: (sighs) No, I'm not, but I'm saying it as though I were you.

Robert: But you're not. No one in the world is greater than I.

Dr P'g: --U (to self) At least his grammar is good. (To Robert) Ok then, you can say "your family, the Jurgen's, were founded in 560 B.C by…whoever, and say that your family has always lived in Germany."

Robert: (nods but the impression that he's mad rubs off)

Dr. P'g: Now, Cosmo, do you have a story about your family history?

Cosmo: Story? Sounds like fun! What's it about? Godzilla?

Dr. P'g: No, Cosmo, I want you to tell me about _your_ family history.

Cosmo: I have a family? WOW!

Dr. P'g:(glares) Yes, that's wonderful, now tell us about them.

Cosmo: Who?

Dr. P'g: your family!

Cosmo: I have a family? WOW!

Dr. P'g: YOU JUST SAID THAT 3 SECONDS AGO!

Cosmo: …said what?

Dr. P'g: (glares) …- CODY! Tell us about your family.

Cody: (sad, goth-like voice) My father is dead.

Dr. P'g: …oh…I'm sorry. Is there anything else? Maybe something about your mom?

Cody: …No.

Dr. P'g: Your mom didn't die, too, did she?

Cody: …No.

Dr. P'g: Oh…just not in the mood to talk, huh? That's ok. We'll get back to you later. (moves eyes along the room) Joe! Why don't you tell us about your family?

Joe: Sure. Hi, I'm Jyou, better known as Joe, and I'm the youngest of 3-out of siblings that is. My brother Jim likes to take my stuff, and can really bug me sometimes, of course, in return he lets me borrow the car. And my other brother-the 'unknown' one is George, he's a pretty good brother, but my dad can be kind of a soar thumb if you know what I mean (chuckle). My dad wants me to be the best in the world when it comes to being a doctor-

Dr. P'g: Joe, I hate to cut you off…but you're completely off topic.

Joe: How?

Dr. P'g: I said family history…not family members.

Joe: Oh, ok…

Dr. P'g: Well?

Joe: I really don't know my family history.

Robert: (rolls eyes) How utterly uncouth.

Dr. P'g: Please stop saying that, Robert. It's very negative.

Robert: I'll say it if I please!

Dr. P'g: Whatever…Anyway, let's move on.

Joe: But I didn't get to correct what I said.

Dr. P'g: Later, Joe, later. (scans the room yet again) How about you, Ryo?

Ryo: Me?

Dr. P'g: Yes, why don't you tell us about you family history?

Ryo: Um…I don't know my family history…

Dr. P'g: Nothing? Not a thing?

Ryo: Nope.

Dr. P'g: You don't even know where you're from?

Ryo: Japan…that's where I was born.

Dr. P'g: And you parents were born in…?

Ryo: I don't know…Japan?

Dr. P'g: What about your grandparents?

Ryo: Japan?

Dr. P'g: Ok, see, were off to a good start here! Your great-grandparents?

Ryo: …Japan?

((10 minutes later))

Dr. P'g:(glares) Your next door neighbours who are _American_?

Ryo: . . …Japan?

Dr. P'g: Your local newscaster man who just moved here from France?

Ryo: Oooh! I know this one! JAPAN!

Dr. P'g: --;; Ok, Ren? Do you know _your _family history?

Ren: Yes, indeed I do. It starts off in 780 A.D. with my great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-

Dr. P'g: (to self whileRen continues saying 'great' in the background) Great…another dragger…

((5 minutes go by))

Ren: …great-great-great grandfather. He lived in old China and got married. He and his new wife started up the shaman work we do now-mainly it dealt with assassination.

Dr. P'g: (wakes up after he's done saying greatby hearing the word 'China' and 'Shaman' and starts to pay attention) This is very interesting. What happened next?

Ren: Nothing much, really. The next best thing is when he had my great-great-great-great-great-

Dr. P'g: Ok, you and Robert need to learn how many "greats" there are and how to use "To the power of". Let's see…who's next? How about…007?

007: Ok…Um…I'm from Britain.

Dr. P'g: That's great!

007: In Britain there are very many famous people! I am one of them!

Dr. P'g: Ok, let's not go overboard here.

007: No! Here me out! I do plays with my girlfriend

(some snickering goes on in the background)

007: I'm serious! We were madly in love!

Dr. P'g: What exactly does this have to do with your family history?

007: I'm getting there! Anyway, we planned to have a family together and everything.

Robert: You hinder retard! That's your future!

Dr. P'g: What have I said about discouraging people, Robert?

Robert: (rolls eyes)

007: Well, than all I can tell you is that I was born in Great Britain.

Dr. P'g: Um…ok…that'll do for now. Who's next…or at least, who has a family history story?

Mimi: I do! Pick me!

Dr. P'g: Ok, Mimi, shoot.

Mimi: What?

Dr. P'g: Shoot.

Mimi: Shoot what?

Dr. P'g: Your story.

Mimi: But I didn't write my story on paper.

Dr. P'g: --U When I say "shoot" I mean "go ahead".

Mimi: Go where?

Dr. P'g: Just tell your story.

Mimi: Ok! I was walking down the street and I ran into Shobu…

Dr. P'g: What does Shobu have to do with your family history?

Mimi: Shobu's part of my family?

Dr. P'g: That seems to be what you're telling me.

Mimi: (giggles) Shobu's not part of my family, or at least not since the last time I checked.

Dr. P'g: Could you continue on about your family history?

Mimi: My family is part of history?

Dr. P'g: (glares)…Next…

Ralph: Hi, I'm Ralph and my daddy's a policeman.

Dr. P'g: That's great, Ralph, but we're talking about family history.

Ralph: My teacher says I'm too dumb to know about history.

Dr. P'g: Well…um…that's why you're here…to prove her wrong. Now, tell us about your family history.

Ralph: I like cat-food.

Everyone: EW!

Dr. P'g: --U

Robert: You rash (idiotic) simpleton!

Ralph: I have a big rash on my bum.

007: AH! METAL IMAGES!

(everyone shrieks)

Dr. P'g: SETTLE DOWN, EVERYONE!

(Everyone settles down)

Dr. P'g: Ok, Ralph, do you, or do you not, know _anything _about your family history?

Ralph: What's a history?

Dr. P'g: (glares)

Ralph: I like to stick crayons up my noise.

Dr. P'g: GGRRR! That's it! I've had it! (storms out)

Patrick: Phew, it was almost my turn, and I forgot to bring my show-and-tell.

Cosmo: I've got lots to show…and tell…I think. (shifty eyes)

Patrick: I wish I could fly.

Cosmo: (hovering above Patrick) Me too.

Patrick: Hey! Everyone! Let's go jellyfishing!

Everyone-minus Robert and Ren: YAY!

Ren: This is absolutely ridicules!

Patrick: _Heeeeeey!_ Why is "jellyfishing" underlined in red, when Jellyfish are blue. sees the word "jellyfishing" underlined in red again HEY! STOP THAT!

Robert: It's the computer, you life-reject! No wonder you were banished to the sea!

((A/N: I wrote it on microsoft...it was underlined in red because the computer didn't recognize the word.))

Patrick: o.o? Banished? Does that mean I'm getting a strawberry cake?

(Robert and Ren-who've also just about had it- leave)

Ryo: . . And then there were (sees Joe and Cody leaving as well) (counts everyone) 1,2,3,4,5.

Mimi: You mean 6! You forgot to count yourself.

Ryo: No, I just didn't count that chewed up piece of gum…because…well…I wasn't sure _what _it is!

Patrick: HEY! There's nothing wrong with being shapely challenged!

Ryo: Shapely isn't even a word! Is it?

Patrick: Yeah…well…Ryo isn't a word either! Neither is um…(counts on his fingers) table, sock, garbage man…

Ryo: That's because garbage man is two words! And Ryo is my name!

Patrick: ¬¬ _suuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuure it is… _I know who you are…Mr. Catalogue…

Ryo: (glares)…Right. (he leaves)

Patrick: See, I told you he was a catalogue!

Mimi: . Now there's 5!

(007 randomly leaves)

Mimi: …4.

Ralph: I can make bubbles with my noise!

Mimi: …3.

(Mimi leaves)

(Cosmo and Patrick have a stare down)

Cosmo: I ain't moving my eyes.

Patrick: my eyes aren't moving my head, either, Cosmo! If that is your real name!

Cosmo: (gasp) How did you know!

Patrick: I. Don't. Know.

Ralph: Uh-oh! I made an oopies in my pants. I need my daddy to make me feel better. Bye Mr. deranged- gum-spit and Mr. Fairy-that-comes-in-my-dreams-and-makes-the-animals-do-crazy-things.

(Ralph leaves)

Cosmo: (glares) Now it's just us.

Patrick: (glares) Yes…it is.

Cosmo: (glares) I'm hungry.

Patrick: (also glaring) So am I.

Cosmo: (still glaring) Would you like to get something to eat with me?

Patrick: (continues glaring) I would like that…a lot.

(Patrick and Cosmo spend the rest of the day "Jellyfishing".)

* * *

P'g: Like a lot of my stories this one was written before I started going on fanfiction. (smiles) I hope you enjoyed it! R&R! 


End file.
